Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Amanda's Rules for Surviving an Arizona Summer

I've been an Arizona native my whole life (born in Phoenix, moved at 6 to Tucson) so sweltering summers are all I've known and yet the heat manages to donkey punch me every time it arrives. I've learned a few things through living in the desert that I've had to learn the hard way:
1. Ease into your car if it's been parked more than ten minutes. You will burn your rump if you're wearing shorts or a skirt otherwise.
2. Avoid playground equipment or your child will burn their rump and you'll feel like an asshole.
3. Heat stroke sucks.
4. Snakes come out a lot this time of year (I almost stepped on a baby rattlesnake during a jog a couple years back).

So if you plan on visiting Arizona during the summer or if you actually live here and just want to commiserate here's Amanda's Rules for Surviving an Arizona Summer.

1. Wear Sunscreen

This should pretty much be a given. Out here you get sun exposure sitting on the toilet, so it's inevitable that without sunscreen you will burn. And burning/sun exposure/UV rays equal skin damage and skin damage equals premature aging not to mention the worst possible outcome- skin cancer. I don't mean to diss the sun so much, the dude has his benefits in moderation, but you should protect yourself before venturing out around here (or anywhere for that matter).

2. AC, AC, AC!

If you have to go out to get the kids out of the house or if you're getting cabin fever yourself, venture out into places that blast the AC. Most cities have indoor play areas which I'll be using during the day more than the actual park (see #2 of Things I've Learned the Hard Way). We visit The Tucson Children's Museum to get Jack's wiles out. It has indoor and outdoor play areas, interactive activities and in the summer the outdoor activities tend to be water play related. The membership fee is a pretty good deal and it's tax deductible. Check it out!

3. Wear As Little As Possible

Now is the time to start exercising your right to wear sundresses, sandals, shorts, skirts, tanks and tunics. Overload on the clothes and it's going to be boob sweat city. Wear light fabrics.

4. Get Your Hair Out Of Your Face
Right now is about the time that the ladies of Tucson do the annual shearing, lopping off their hair due to the oppressive heat, which is actually a pretty good strategy if you're in the market for a shorter do. However, if you're trying to grow your hair out, I'd recommend putting it up. My favorite angle on this is the messy bun.

It looks cute, relaxed and chic. You can make it more casual for day or gussy it up for night, add a side braid or a barrette or headband and viola!

5. Burt's Bee's Lip Shimmer

I recommend this because it has flattering shades for everybody and the peppermint in it gives you a quick little pick me up on your lips that's pretty refreshing. Watermelon and rhubarb are my go to's

6. Otter Pops

I've been down with OPP (Otter Poppy Pops to make that pun work) since I was but a young lass and now that I've got a Costco membership we buy those suckers in bulk. They last about two weeks around here.

7. Pools and ice water
Because if you aren't IN a body of water or drinking the equivalent of a body of water evaporation may occur.

8. Getting Wasted Again In Margaritaville If all else has failed and you've put the children to bed and are left thinking "it's still effing hot and I'm about to lose it", well, there's always the power of a margarita with lots and lots of ice. Or pina coladas. Or mojitos...or...

So stay cool, stay calm. Fall is only about 4 months away.


Together We Save said...

Wow - I love that picture of the dog in frontof the fan!! Very funny.

adriana said...

i love Otter Pops!!!!

Chelsea Robbins said...

scrolling down, i ended up smiling when i got to the otter pops and burts shimmer gloss.

summer makes me happy!