Monday, June 15, 2009

In bullet points and pictures...

I haven't been blogging too much lately because well, it's been TOO MUCH lately. Between this house buying crap, planning and polishing my first burlesque show, being a mother to a toddler who seems to be getting faster and more inquisitive everyday, and now job hunting, I haven't really found the time nor the words to really type anything of value or interest. But I don't like leaving my blog stagnant for too long so here I am. I decided I'd use bullet points since that's the only way I really get anything done these days.

* We're waiting in the stress building limbo that is closing on a house (or condo in our case). Being that it's a short sale, we're jumping through all of these hoops even though the bank has the final say. They can either reject our offer, accept our offer, foreclose the house or put the house up for auction (this is how I understand it to be anyway since real estate isn't really my forte). We want/need to be out of the house we're renting by the end of the summer, and suddenly those deadlines are creeping in on each other and everything feels clasterphobic. I loathe this house buying crap. LOATHE it. So much stress and strain, if we get this place we'll probably live in it until retirement or possibly until death because as god is my witness, I'm not doing this again unless it's for a REALLY good reason.

*We tried adopting a puppy. We brought Sid home on Saturday and promptly returned him to his previous owners Monday afternoon. This was a huge blow to me, as most people know I've been chomping at the bit for a Bull Terrier for quite some time now. We found Sid on Craigslist who was a Bull Terrier/Pit Bull mix for free so we jumped at the offer. Well it seems owning a puppy in my head and owning a puppy in real life are two different things entirely. Needless to say I wasn't prepared for the stress of training a puppy AND raising a toddler at the same time. Nor were we ready financially (we could have *squeezed* him in our budget, but if something bad happened that would entail a huge vet bill, we'd be fucked which isn't something you want to be when taking on a mortgage). So I bucked up, kissed my naivety goodbye and sent Sid back home. I was crushed, not because of the puppy, but because I realized I can't do it all. I have my limits and they aren't of Wonder Woman magnitude. I couldn't do burlesque, and raise Jack, get a job AND give this puppy a happy life without drastically compromising the quality of all those things.

"I want to be the girl with the most cake..."

*The whole burlesque thing is going well. I fall more and more in love with it every time I make another piece to my costume or cultivate my character. The women I'm in the troupe with are so wonderful, and for once I feel comfortable in a group of women which, if you know me, has not been an easy feat up until now. It's amazing how much confidence it has given me and how much more ease I feel in my own skin and character. It's been priceless.

*Jack is growing and amazing me more and more. He's so fun to be around and brings so much light into our lives it's complete insanity! I find myself almost punch drunk around him. Nuzzling his sun kissed cheeks, reading him books, squeezing him until he's like "damn, ease up lady!" I can't help but look at him in wonderment and think "holy shit, I really made him!" The finest masterpiece ever.

Here's some pics since I ran out of what I was going to type-

I was trying to be creative.

Sid, the puppy that wasn't.

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